Saturday, November 7, 2009

bit's a pieces

Well there have been a few well no too interesting things going on lately so i thought i'd do a short blog with just a few recaps on things here and there.

* I have been preparing for my interview to become second assistant at Safeway. The interview is on the 17th of November and will be a panel interview with Brett our district manager, Signe our HR rep and maybe another store manager. I'm a bit nervous but i think I'm kinda prepared. i can only do as best as i can do and if it's not good enough then I'm just not ready. I'm just afraid that i'm just wanna give up.

* I've been trying my best to hang out with all my friends lately because i really do love them all and wish i could spend all my free time with all of them. Last weekend i had lunch with crystal and her son at the Cheesecake factory and then this weekend i had breakfast with Linnea. These are the friends with kids so it is harder to get time together. it was nice to be able to hang out with them and catch up!

* I've been thinking a lot about the fact that i'm on depression med's. i for one am not ashamed or embarrassed to be on them but i have come across people lately who say they are unhappy but refused to be on depression med's because they should be able to make themselves happy. i have thought a lot about that and wondered if i should have tried harder to make myself happy. i have come to the compulsion that i did all that i could to be happy and i did have happy moments but it was the bad times where i would sit and cry for hours over absolutely nothing that made me want to get help. I realized that my uncontrollable mood swings were out of my control and that it just had to be a chemical imbalance because there is no way i would have let myself be so unhappy. I told myself that it was sick of wasted days of crying and i wanted to take my life into my own hands so i got help. and you know what i don't regret a bit of that decision. i have been happy nearly everyday (of course i get upset about normal things but now i can get over them without a complete melt down)

* I've had this overwhelming erge to have a baby lately. i have all this nerturing in me that is just dieing to be released. I love throwing parties because it is a good reason to make fun foods. i love making foods by scratch. i love making my house a home. it love every bit of taking care of mat (even though he doesn't let me take care of him as much as i would like to) i like making him breakfast and lunch and dinner. i love doing his laundry. But this nurturing can only go so far. Now just to convince him that he wants a baby within the next two years.

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